Let’s just be honest…… I need a week to catch up on sleep. I haven’t been “well rested” in 15 years since my son was born. Seeing as my youngest is going on 9 years old, I only have 9 years to go until I can get some sleep! Last week I was given the job of picking up my aunt flying in from Oregon from the airport. I got up early, got coffee, arrived 45 minutes before her flight landed. When it came time to circle through the arrivals to pick her up, we very quickly realized I was at the wrong airport two hours away from the airport she was waiting at. She was so nice and told me she would just rent a car. As for myself, I had a complete meltdown. AKA adult pity party. I’ve been going nonstop. The kids ball games, school, work, and the occasional hair appt. (My hair dresser no longer takes it personal if I sit in her chair and say nothing.) So what did I do? I cried and cried. My tears were bigger than just being at the wrong the airport. They were tears of feeling like a failure.
I learned a long time ago that the devil isn’t in the family business. He wants me to feel defeated, burned out, and like a failure. See there is this thing called grace. Grace changes EVERYTHING! It is vital to our existence. I often repeat a quote I learned while doing some soul searching. “I will hold myself to a standard of grace not perfection” by Life Coach Jaclyn Costello. If you’re from the south you have heard women say you need both grit and grace. Grit= determines that life challenges will never defeat or define us. Grace=gives kindness to ourselves and others even when its hard. Ladies….. we do not have enough grit or give ourselves enough grace.
I have some of the most amazing friends. I know at any given time I could call on them for help and they can call me. Helping with kids, cleaning house, moving, needing meals, picking up something, it doesn’t matter we know we cant do it all without each other. We know that we all have crazy lives and getting a happy birthday text 3 days late would never in 1000 years upset any of us. Ladies…. if you’re finding yourself having frequent cry sessions of feeling like a failure, it is time to take a step back. Get on pinterest and read some grace quotes. If you don’t have a group of lady friends that you can call on and do life with then you need to work on making friends! My mom always taught me you have to be a friend to have a friend. Its not all about you and what you need. I saw someone totally disregard a neighbor once because the neighbor didn’t say hi to her, the neighbor said hi to the person she was standing with. Really? Get over yourself. Throw your hand up and say “Hey neighbor!”. Be friendly. Be kind. You reap what you sow. Do I knock the friend thing out of the park? No. I have to apologize for breaking plans, saying something I shouldn’t have, hurting feelings, etc. This is what relationships are about. I recently went through a friend break up because she thought I somehow got her kicked off a team. This pains me that she would think that at all. There is nothing I can say or do she will just have to find out herself one day that I had no part in it. Relationships are messy. We have to love each other through the messiness and give each other grace otherwise we will end up bitter. Bitter isn’t cute.
Love and be loved ladies. We are tired moms. We need each other!